I have never been one to wrap myself in the American flag. Instead, I have looked askance at the injustices of our society with a jaundiced, sarcastic view and wondered, ‘What the hell is our problem?’ To elaborate, it consistently galls me this absolute obsession we as a people seem to have in making sure we have a group to hate. For some bizarre reason, it seems to make us more comfortable with our shortcomings.
Time was - less than fifty years ago in fact - we used to hang blacks from trees for looking at white women. Women have had the right to vote for less than a hundred years. Seems like the newest wave of immigrants are ostracized by those that passed through Ellis Island before them, as if to say ‘The door closed behind us, bub.’
But over time, the assimilation of these peoples, and the simple adherence to our founding principles has rendered the heinous injustices to these people more or less to the history books. Racism still exists, but at least they aren’t lynching negroes in Mississippi anymore. Women still have glass ceilings to break through, but the cracks are extremely evident – it's just a matter of time there.
So the pool of people to pick on has shrunk. But we are a creative bunch, we Americans. Don't tell us we can't do something. Don't tell ME that we are all created equal. By golly, we will find someone to turn our unjustified bigotry and anger towards. And we’ve seem to have found our latest group. Gays.
I am not gay. And I am also about the least homophobic person you will ever meet. I am firmly of the opinion that if someone can find another person to love, honor and cherish to walk hand-in-hand through this sometimes very dark dirge we call life, it matters none whether they share the same sexual organs. If two people are happy, what’s it to me.
And what’s it to you?
Really. If you are a person that is against equal rights to gays, or ever worse, harbors anger towards gays, what the hell is your problem? What is it that makes you hate two people finding love and happiness? Is this a sociopathic streak that you’re secretly fermenting towards people that seem to find a happiness that has somehow eluded you? Does everyone have to be as miserable as you? Does the idea of two people of the same sex copulating repulse you - is that it?
Or do you just need someone to hate? If so, welcome to America. You’re fitting in quite nicely.
Because you are far from alone in that neanderthal view. Laws are being passed in scores of states banning gay marriage. Now please ponder that for moment. Our legislators & by extension the people they represent feels we need laws preventing something that does not impact you in any way. If gays are allowed to marry, it does not affect your marriage or your life in even a remote way. If you're happily married, you are free to remain that way whether gays receive that same right or not. If your marriage is a mess, why not allow gays the same chance at that misery? For that matter, why are you defending something that only about fifty percent of the participants are successful at? As Anna Quindlen stated in a recent issue of Newsweek, "As for the notion that allowing gay men and lesbians to marry will destroy conventional marriage, I have found heterosexuals perfect willing to do that themselves."
Again I ask - What's it to you?
Opponents to gay marriage say its about not allowing people a loophole to receiving health insurance benefits. Well heavens no – we can’t actually have MORE people freed from the anxiety that a broken leg could mean financial ruin, can we? Others cite religious reasons and Bible passages as their justification. Well look – I’m not a Theologian, and as such do not want to delve into what this Book of Solomon says or that Book of Job says. Those that profess to know what God thinks (Here's a piece of advice: avoid these people) would say that homosexuality is a sin, punishable by eternal damnation.
That seems a bit harsh for committing an egregious act of love. But maybe that’s just me. Instead I would just offer this simple & very un-religious-trained observation over this whole ‘religion’ angle –
What would God think?
I believe the answer is that He (or She) wants us happy, and as such would be pleased at two people finding love and companionship. I really don’t think flesh-burning in eternity is what is in store for those who have found a life partner to live, love and laugh with simply because Tab A doesn't fit into Slot B. My guess is that God would smile at such an event.
A friend of mine says the reason for our ongoing search for a group to hate is because we are a ‘young’ country, in that we have not yet gotten through our growing pains. I can kinda hang with that. My guess is that most more ‘mature’ countries laugh at us for our teenaged impetuosity & predisposition to hate.
I see only one answer. We need to grow the hell up. There's really no need to hate anyone, and any two people that enjoy each other's company to the point that they wish to make a lifelong commitment to each other should be honored, not derided.
And certainly not made illegal.